Tuesday, 30 August 2022

The Straggler

 





I wrote a love letter 

To the love of my life 

At least I felt so at the time.

Maybe she just reminded me of better times


Ones where a sense of ease 

was like breathing 

Ones where what was on the way 

Still gleamed like stars in space 


Now my mental space, 

most often 

feels like the space in between:

Nothingness, if not for the light..


But what can be said about the light?


It’s silly. Seemingly arbitrary.

Frustratingly limited.

Ever-present, yet gone before you notice.

Alive. 


Even when some gratingly public Intellect points their craggy finger at the sky

to say: “that light’s been on its way here for millions of years.”


I understand what they really meant to say:

“Wherever it’s from is long gone. 

Whatever it left is likely now dark 

or irrevocably, unrecognizably changed…

Just like us someday. To bad. What a straggler…”


yet still, I stand there feeling over joyed 

Maybe even honoured. 

That this straggling ray of light 

bothered to brave the void at all 


It’s warmth is scant, fleeting,

and comically post-dated

But somehow also impeccably timed.

Unmistakably real and present tense.


So I lie, nodding to the intellect 

Pretending to be sad about the whole thing.

“Yeah that’s crazy...” I mumble, instead of:

“What a beautiful night”









Introducing Vandals Weekly


I’m a regular human being: I like words, sounds, and making things. But I don’t like attention. I’ve had enough of that for one lifetime. So this is just my way of putting out all the stuff I’ve made over the past ~8 years without having to deal with that. Not that anyone was ever paying attention tbh. I’m in my 30s now and going all in on being a “great artist” didn’t really pan out in my 20s. Probably for the best giving my affinity for excuses, partying and substances. My only real goal here is to post consistently for like a year and maybe gain like 1 to 2 regular readers. That would be nice. The name Vandals weekly doesn’t mean much either. Vandals is the working title for a book I hope to finish one day. The weekly part is me preemptively trying to temper any expectations. A weekly post seems like an achievable goal for me at this point in my life, but to start it’ll be closer to daily. Also, as a subject, vandalism will likely only ever be addressed in passing. Occasional guest posts from friends as well.